How to Help a Friend Who is Struggling With Addiction
One of the most difficult situations in life is finding a way to live with, help or interact with a close friend or family member struggling with addiction.
Something as simple as initiating a conversation about the person’s substance abuse can seem like an impossible undertaking. If you dare broach the subject, the reaction is might be hostile or the addicted person may retreat to a position of bitter defensiveness.
Even so, psychologists who specialize in substance abuse treatment say that having “the conversation” is an important first step. There is a right away and several wrong ways to talk to a person about his or her addiction.
First, look for an opportunity when the person is sober or not under the influence. If you try to talk to a person while drunk or high, you’ll only end up getting into a bad situation. Second, have the conversation in a neutral location and in a situation where you can take some time and not be rushed.
The way you converse is also important. Keep in mind that no one is harder on a substance abuser than themselves. They don’t need someone else coming down hard on them with blaming, judgments, critical comments and high-minded lectures.
While compassion is key, you also don’t want to coddle an addict. It’s a good idea to stick to facts and present them with stark realities. That might include naming dangerous behaviors you have observed. You might also talk about the harmful effects being suffered by friends and family — not in a blaming way but a factual way.
Come at your conversation with the goal of imparting the message: “I care about you and I want to help you.”
Of course, when all else fails, you might want to consider a group intervention. This involves gathering a group of family members, friends and other associates who care about the addicted individual. It’s important that an intervention be well-planned because a lot of things can go wrong.
It is strongly recommended that you seek the help of a professional to help you organized your intervention and learn what to do and what not to do. This is not a way to “gang up” on a person who is hurting from their disease. The goal is to encourage the person to agree to seek professional help.
